Monday's Musing...Who am I?

This past year has been one that has caused me a lot of frustration and hurt,

emotionally.

It's also been a year where I've grown by leaps and bounds,

spiritually. 

I felt the bitter sting of  judgements and assumptions of others...

I participated (Please know I'm not proud at all for these actions) in judging and assuming things about others... 

I felt betrayed...

I cried... 

I hurt...

I felt the evil dart of gossip, catapult from my lips, and into another's heart...

I felt that dart come right back and pierce my own...

It was awful.  Not a pain I'm willing to inflict on anyone,

ever. again.

I was reading this wonderful blog RESOLVED2WORSHIP  and her words whispered comfort to my heart, as they so often do... 

The professor's story... had me in tears...  The story about the tree (below)...filled me with hope...

I don't know how I had lost sight... I know we are all daughters and sons of God.... What we do to others we might as well do to him... 

And there's no way I'm throwing darts at my savior anymore...

"…There was a man who had four sons. He wanted them to learn to not judge things too quickly, so he sent them each on a quest to go and look at a pear tree that was a great distance away.

He sent his first son in the winter, his second in the spring, his third in summer and his youngest in the fall. When they had all gone and come back, he called them together to describe what they had seen.

The first son said that the tree was ugly, bent, and twisted.

The second son said no – it was covered with green buds and full of promise.

The third son disagreed, he said it was laden with blossoms that smelled so sweet and looked so beautiful, it was the most graceful thing he had ever seen.

The last son disagreed with all of them; he said it was ripe and drooping with fruit, full of life and fulfillment.

After hearing all his son’s responses, the wise father replied, “Sons, you are all right — because you have each seen only one season in the tree’s life. But you cannot judge a tree, or a person, or anything else by only one season. Most things can only be measured at the end, when all the seasons have come to pass”."

Thoughtfully, Jenn

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Monday's Musing On PEACE, and on a Wednesday ;)

Once again it's Tuesday, and another Monday has breezed by me.  I really DON'T like how easily time can escape me lately.  This weekend Hubbs and the babe were sick, and now you can add 2 more kiddos to that count. FUN!  But anyways, on to my random 'musing'

I was watching a PBS special on Sunday about a group of people that did a Peace climb up to Mount Everest.  If you want to watch it, the next airing is Dec 4 @ 7PM

EVEREST: A CLIMB FOR PEACE chronicles the journey of nine "peace climbers" from different faiths and cultures as they attempt to summit the tallest mountain in the world. Actor Orlando Bloom, also a United Nations Ambassador for UNICEF, narrates. Filmed on location in Nepal, Tibet, Israel, Palestine, Jordan, U.A.E. and the United States, the documentary focuses on Palestinian Ali Bushnaq and Israelis Dudu Yifrah and Micha Yaniv. Setting aside their differences, they come together to forge a path of teamwork and cooperation. This, however, is easier said than done. Each believes their respective nations, embroiled in a brutal war for years, lie on the right side of the conflict. A socially relevant film about peace, war and the human spirit, EVEREST: A CLIMB FOR PEACE features spectacular Everest footage, including a dramatic rescue near the summit.


It was amazing to watch friendships form out of enemies. 
It got me to thinking how very much we all are alike on the human level.  If only we could just look past people's religions, politics, social status, and just focus on humanity.  How much more peaceful this world really would be.  It's almost near impossible I realize, but while watching this documentary, you get a glimpse that it really can happen. 
I'm not saying dismiss your religion, or your politics. Not at all.  But maybe if we all tried harder to look at others as our savior would.... On a human level.  Wouldn't that make for a better world? 

This is my goal.  (Not that I judge everyone that is NOT like me.  I don't. Well, I certainly don't try to anyway.)  But, what can it hurt?  If I tried a little harder
Anyways I'm just randomly rambling now.

Happy Wednesday everyone!

"Don't try to figure out what other people want to hear from you; figure out what you have to say. It's the one and only thing you have to offer."

~ Barbara Kingslover

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Monday's Musings on Tuesday. "5 Years"

I was feeling quite under the weather yesterday.  Still not feeling awesome today, I just don't want to get into the habbit of NOT blogging, because then, well, I WON'T and it's been a new goal of mine to blog a little every day (mainly for sanity purposes)  So I bring you, my musing. 5 years.

5 Years Ago

Five years. 

Five years doesn't really seem like a lot does it?  It never really did to me, I guess it still doesn't and THAT'S the scary part. ha ha

Five years ago I was still a twenty-something barely 26.

Five years ago I had my first baby.

Five years ago my whole world shifted.  I never knew I was capable of loving another human so completely, so wholly.  (I was also consumed with overwhelming love for my mother, I never really knew how much she loved me until I had Ocean.  I Love you SO much Mom!!!)

Five years ago I was the "biggest" I've ever been in my life thanks to my little bambino, and I'd love to be that "big" again.  (And I will, that's just a whole other musing ha ha!)

Five years ago I found my faith.  It was a loooooong rough journey back, but I'm forever grateful for that journey.

Five years ago I still had my Granddad, my Grandma, and my sister in-law here on earth to Hug and love...

Five years ago  I was a wife for the second time (the time I was meant for <3) , and the mom of a Middle Schooler, Kindergartner, and infant. 

Fast forward 5 years

Today I'm a Thirty-something barely 31 (That, won't sound so bad 5 years from now! ha ha ha)

Today I'm done having babies.  What a short little bit of my life that was, and I mourn the end of it.  WHY is this?!  I should be happy that I won't balloon to un-natural proportions ever again, but still, this realization hurts and tugs those heart strings...

Today my world is still shifted, apparently you can love each child with that same intensity. AWESOME!! I really didn't think I could love anyone as much as Ocean.  Thankfully, I can! :) 

Today, I'm officially the biggest I've ever been. THIS bites, but you know, it's a sacrafice I made for my babes.  Maybe I'll be a size 3 again, maybe I won't.  I will however focus on being healthy more than being skinny, no matter how badly-BADLY I want it. (sigh)

Today I have a calling (position) at church that allows me to be with the Young Women, and I LOVE it!  I'm so amazed at their strength and faith!

Today I no longer have my Granddad, my Grandma, or my sweet sister in-law to hug and love on, but I have their love surrounding me, and their legacy they left behind... Though I miss them so much my heart aches....

Today I still am a wife for the second time (the only time that counts <3) and the mom of a SENIOR, a fifth grader, a kindergartner, a pre-schooler, and a monster 16 month old :) We also have a new additon "Cassie" added to our family tree. (Cassie is Will's daughter that was placed in adoption 18 years ago in order for her to have a better life)  They recently have met for the first time and we're blessed to have her be part of our family!

5 Years from now

In Five years I'll still be a thirty-something barely 36 ;)

In Five years I'll still be done having babes, hopefully I'll have moved passed the grieving of this stage.

In Five years I WON'T be the biggest I've ever been, But I probably won't be my smallest either, and that's definately okay with me.

In Five years I'll still have my faith.  Of this, I am certain.

In Five years I'll probably have lost more people that I love, and my heart will still ache, but hopefully I'll have the strength I need to get through those losses...

In Five years I'll still be a wife for the second time (to my forever love <3) and the mom of a Twenty-something, an almost 16 year old, a 10 year old, an 8 year old,  and once again a kindergartner for the last time....

In Five years I could very well be,   Wait for it,

A GRANDMA!!!!!! YIKES! 

Where will you be in 5 years?  Something fun to ponder.

Happy Monday, er, TUESDAY everyone!

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Monday's musings

 

On being a "professional" photographer

PROFESSIONAL: Following an occupation as a means of livelihood or for gain.

I guess I feel motivated to write a post on this subject because on blogs everywhere, I see where people have started their own photography business  from no 'know-how' or 'formal' education in the field of photography. Just RAW talent and a desire :) (Which is great, if you're awesome) BUT, then some turn around and feel themselves fit to pooh pooh other beginners with the same love of photography.  Deeming their work not good enough in the "new professional's" eyes... (Which is NOT great, even if you are awesome) I ask, who's place is it to judge others Art? Isn't Art defined by how others intrepret it? And if others (clients)  deem the work worthy of pay who are we to judge otherwise?

I agree there IS bad photography I have done my fair share.  I think that's how we learn, unfortunately for the people we "shoot"  0.o  Everyone has to start out somewhere right?

But really, what do we gain by putting others down?  I've seen some of my friends become "professional photographers" I'm someone's "professional photographer friend"   I think this happens all the time so easily because, for me anyway, it was a fun hobby, and when people first (usually my family &  friends)  saw my work they started wanting me to take their pictures, and then their friend's pictures and so on.  Are we, as "hobbiests" or "enthusiasts" supposed to keep taking pictures for "free" or, do we start to charge something for our time?  Which for me, (as I think for most) is a precious commodity. 

Well, I decided to charge for my time.  Making me, by defintion, a "professional."  Though I definatley don't feel like a professional.  There are some CRAZY awesome  photogs out there that are what you'd consider a 'professional' in the traditional sense.  A lot of them have done this (photography) before the digital explosion and encroachment of digital hobbiests and ammatuers on their turf. 

So I guess my point is, we all have friends who already are, or are beginning to dabble with the idea of being/ becoming a photographer.  It's all around us with the increased sales of DSLR's to regular 'joes' :)  the wealth of information that can be found on the internet in different forums, and the ENORMOUS amount of workshops geared toward ammatuers.  Be supportive, be happy that they share the same love of the Art you do, be happy about their successes, be happy about your successes, but please don't take that (your success) as a free ticket to berate others with the same dream/goal.

~Jenn  an accidental "professional" photographer


There are no rules for good photographs, there are only good photographs.

~Ansel Adams

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